The Mortal Instruments

Recommendation: You have other options, with the notable exception of Twilight, they’re probably better

Where to read: Transport

Read with: A paralytic on your critical thinking skills

In brief: Girl meets boy, boy is a demon hunter, girl is a demon hunter but doesn’t know it, girl and boy fall in love and kill things together, girl and boy might be siblings, Dad is a sociopath/basically Hitler, major romantic tension!!!!!, hot werewolf, fate of the world, now there’s a psychopath, plot twist we saw coming two books ago, everything broadly fine… I think that covers it.


Trashy, trashy, trashy choices were made over Christmas. This is prime “brain not required” reading, ideally suited for long bus rides, annoying car trips and general holiday malaise.

I have previously mounted a staunch defence of some of my junk-food reading choices but I’m not even going to bother with this. Simply put, it is emotionally shallow, woefully characterised, unevenly paced piffle and the less said about the contrived and convoluted plot (see above) the better. It is also, for someone who’s preferred mindless reading has generally been fantasy/sci-fi, the equivalent of candy floss – it’s a bit sickly but the sugar rush is immediate.

I will give it credit, albeit begrudgingly, for featuring both vampires and werewolves without completely Twilight-ifying them. 

To be honest, I probably should have just reread Harry Potter for the one-billionth time but ah well, some mistakes only take a day or two to hammer through and what else was I really going to do with that time.

PS. DO NOT under ANY circumstances watch the television show. I got one episode in before writing it off as probably the worst book adaption I’ve ever seen.

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